So much terror and trauma, death and killings, sadness and hurt. Sometimes it's nice to (and I know its bad and highly frowned upon) turn a blind eye on all this and reach for an escape. There's no complete escape of course, you always have to come back to the real world (yes, I agree, it sucks).
It's not just the acts which make me despair against humanity that I like to escape from, it's everyday life. It's the sadness I overwhelm myself with when I'm having a bad day. It's the 'nah not today' feeling when I wake up. It's the expectations of me that sometimes I just want to chuck out the window.
Some days it is just better to find escape in either music or a book; that usually works for me.
Books are the more challenging option (probably because it requires effort, oops) because, unless it's an intensely gripping book, like The Girl on the Train (which was AMAZING) it takes so much willpower to convince yourself to keep reading (well for me anyway). Sadly I'm stuck with that at the moment. After rapidly finishing The Kite Runner, I moved onto Travelling to Infinity, which, if you don't know is the biographical piece of literature written by Jane Hawking about her life spent with Stephen. (Aka the book behind 'The Theory of Everything' which I haven't watched so no spoilers please.) It's a remarkable book but some detail I could do without (sorry Jane).
I guess it must be even harder if you're not spiritually connected to books (aka a bookworm) which, most of the time I like to convince myself I am (ha, I'm really not). If you can't see the beauty of a book within at least the first few chapters then what's the point? (which is probably exactly your thoughts before you hide the book away for another few months (or years) before you pick it up again and force yourself to reach the end).
Everyday life is the issue. I can fly through a book in a week by reading parts here and there if I'm on holiday. But I'm not. And I'm very bad at reading when everyday (modern) life is so darn distracting. Why would I want to read when I could switch between Instagram, Snapchat and Twitter every couple of minutes and see no new content? Or when I could re-watch old episodes of Gogglebox? Or sit waiting for one of my friends to make contact with me? (Ha, as if.)
I wish I could be more a more New-York-coffee-shop-reading-classics kinda gal but I'm not and I probably never will be. I'm more a stereotypically-reads-on-holiday-like-the-rest-of-the-nation kinda gal and I can live with that.
Music however has a much different effect on me. It's not something I need to 'get in to' or be in the right mood for. Music is something rather different.
Music can have such an impact. It can change you emotionally; change your behaviour, impact your life. If you are yet to experience this type of world, you haven't found the right song. That one song (or many songs) that hit you right in the heart. The ones where you just have so much passion and fire in your soul that no words seem to do the feeling justice.
When you're on a train (like I currently am) and you just want to scream the lyrics at the tops of your lungs. (Don't worry, I won't. Even if I did people wouldn't know the song so it would just look odd (The Only Hope For Me Is You is the song in case you were wondering)). Or when you're at a party and Mr Brightside comes on and you just feel completely overjoyed with life (really hoping this is a multicultural thing and not just another British quirk).
And I swear I fall in love all over again when I hear The Fall by Imagine Dragons or All I Want by Kodaline. (How a song can ever possess that much beauty I do not know.) And that, that right there is the type of impact I want to gain, whether it be from music or from any other aspect of life.
I want to live my life listening to rebellious Green Day and My Chemical Romance songs while also shedding a tear at Coldplay or Kodaline. I want music to take over my entire existence. I want to relish in my release from this world and live with all the happiness compressed within it.
--- Aimee ---
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