My Rock

Three months ago, when I had just decided that I would set up a blog, I began a small book on topics I would like to cover. I'm not ashamsed to admit that I have barely written about the topics which first came to my mind and I probably wouldn't be able to list more than three topics on it. However, I do know that when I asked my friend, Nicole to write down any topics I should cover she simply wrote "Nicole". I will say that my imidate thought was 'why couldn't she have written something I could actually write about' but I've realised that she did write something I can actually write about. I could write about my love and appreciation for my dear friend Nicole.

I suppose it only makes sense to start from the beginning. I first met Nicole when I was probably about 5, at primary school. She was the kind of friend who I could easily talk to and meet up with but we never really were that close. That being the case, I remember many memories from primary school which we shared and I am lucky enough to have spent many years at dance with her. The same situation lasted many years of secondary school if I'm honest. We often spoke but not on a regular basis or about anything too deep.

Fast forward to the begining of this summer. I personally wasn't in a good place. I was feeling shit on a regular basis, exams were causing me to have several breakdowns a week, my 'friends' thought it would be acceptable to point out my flaws to me. Needless to say, it wasn't the best time. Somehow (and I honestly can't remember either how, when or why) I started getting closer to Nicole.

We would talk more about all the drama that was going on. I'd plan to meet her before and after exams. We'd get together to gossip about people and life in general. At the very beginning of the summer holidays, we spent two weeks straight (give or take a couple of days) meeting up, going to town, having sleepovers.

Having left pretty much all of my friends, we ended up going to prom together and she made it such an enjoyable night. And yes I guess I'm almost over the fact she ditched me whilst actually at prom. She is such an incredible and person and quite possibly the best person to spend time with. The type of person you can be completely yourself around.

I'm not quite sure I will ever believe that I have ever done anything good enough to have such an incredible best friend. She's one of the very few people I have ever been able to tell anything to.  Not only can I talk to her about whatever but I can also talk to her whenever. I guess the relationship we have is the typical 'best friends' scenario but I honestly adore our friendship.

As much as I am trying to, I could never even come close to explaining what she means to me. I'm not kidding in the slightest when I say that I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for her. And by that I don't mean at sixth form or with the friends I have, I mean here, on Earth. She has been my rock and I love her so much for it. It makes me so emotional when I think about, near the beginning of summer, when I was such a wreck. All I wanted to do was cry and just give up. Nicole being the absolute angel she is let me stay at hers and it cheered me up more than I ever though it would.

When I have days that I feel like utter crap she is there. Only ever a FaceTime, Snapchat or phone call away. I can't explain well enough how important it is to have someone like that in your life. She makes me laugh on a daily basis and keeps me strong. I know that she is not afraid to tell me when I'm being an idiot because sometimes it's what I need to hear.

Nicole is literally the most outstanding friend anyone could ever wish for. Yes we are mean to eachother about 100 times a day but it makes me so happy that I am that comfortable around her. It wasn't until I was describing her to a friend that I realised how I talk about her. Honestly, I'm not the nicest friend, all I ever do is tell her she is a dick and an idiot and just plain embarrassing. This being the case, I have fairly good reasoning for being so harsh to her.

The only way I know how to be 'a good friend' to people is through words and truth is, she won't ever accept my compliments. We've had a insulting-based relationship for so long she accuses me of wanting something if I'm nice to her. I'll tell her how gorgeous she looks and I'll be told off for being so soppy. If I send her a cute and supportive message she'll tell me how it makes her feel sick.

But it really doesn't matter how many compliments I give her because I could never repay her for how grateful I am to have her. She really is a fantastic person. I'm not afraid to say she's an absolute idiot. She does and says the stupidest things but, in all honesty, it makes my day. Without even trying she can make me laugh. She keeps me strong and happy.

Words cannot express how beautiful she is. She doesn't even have to try. Sure, she'll send me then ugliest snapchats possible, but she's still as gorgeous as ever. Everything about her is truly incredible. The bond we have is something I never, ever want to loose.

Now I know she may not believe it but she means the absolute world to me and I owe her so much. She has really been my shoulder to lean on when I've needed it, my person to turn to when I need advice. No amount of blog posts, letters or texts would ever do her justice.

She has literally changed my life. I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for her and, although there are days when I hate this entire crappy world and the people in it, I'm glad of that. Her smile lights up my world everyday and I am so extremely thankful to have her in my life. She really is the perfect bestfriend. I love her with all my heart and always will do.

--- Aimee ---