Just Another Outcast

"You see us as you want to see us... in the simplest terms and the most convenient definitions."

Recognise the quote? If you do I applaud you on your film taste. If you didn't know, it is from a truly brilliant film entitled 'The Breakfast Club'.

Ah, The Breakfast Club, what a film. It's one of those films that you sort of just sit through but, when you get to the end you look back and realise that you have just witnessed a masterpiece, a true telling of both school and society. I think that quote really summarises the whole film, all about how cliques are separated from each other and how you are defined by the group you are in.

I assume you are thinking this to be a film 'review' (or at least an in-my-opinion-review) but, in all honesty, I have tried to write one about this film before and it just didn't seem to flow. The main issue which is covered by the film is stereotypes, or, more specifically, stereotypes determined by your social group.

Social grouping is a very interesting topic to me. Who even knows how we get into the groups that we do? Maybe it's our actions, our looks, our hobbies and interests? Possibly a mix of them all I guess.

But social groups are extremely 'important' to teenagers especially. I don't mean that they are important as in you worry about it a lot or it concerns you greatly, of course it might do but I mean more that it is relevant and current.

No matter who you are, you will be in a specific group, you may have not defined yourself by this group but, believe me, others will. Even if you somehow don't manage to fit the criteria of any of the main cliques, you have your own. Unfortunately, this is commonly known as 'the outcasts'.

I'm not too sure that cliques are all bad to be honest. You are with people similar to you which is always nice to have right? You share hobbies, interests and friends. Sure, there are many great points and a sense of 'belonging' has a big impact but, what about when you are only a nerd, a pretty girl, a cool guy, an outcast? What then? Do all the things that make us each unique go out the window?

I'm afraid this is usually the case. Personally, I try to give everyone a chance but, there are some groups which I just don't interact with. Mainly by lack of similarities if I'm honest. This usually leads to me avoiding people from this groups or cliques. It may seem harsh but, it's not as though anyone's missing out on much by not speaking to me, we probably wouldn't get on anyways.

Sadly, that's usually the case. Avoiding anyone who doesn't belong to your clique. Afraid of the judgement which lurks over your decision of who you interact with.

I've never quite got it. Never quite understood why people decide to indulge their time and effort into one particular group. I don't know what it is, maybe my unusual mix of hobbies, my unusual music taste or my unusual personality that has made me be such an outcast.

Being an 'outcast' has its perks as well as having its drawbacks if I'm being honest. It's not exactly the thing I'd like to be thought of as or be remembered by though. I don't feel as though I am the 'weirdest' of the 'outcasts' which is probably a blessing which has made life a bit more bearable.

But, as I wander through life, I feel that's what I am. I'm viewed by my peers as an outcast. I am seen as one of those people you don't want to be seen talking to, it might not be the reality of it but it's how things have always come across to me.

I don't want sympathy. I don't want to hear the 'you're lovely, everyone wants you be friends with you'. I'm done with that bullshit. Don't tell me how I should feel, I don't and that's that. These cliques have been embedded into our society for such time that people don't even think twice about it. It's accepted. When one of the 'popular' group members doesn't speak to me it's just another 'well that's life I guess' and a move on.

The issue isn't being in a group, the issue is only being part of a group. Depending on how you read that last line you may or may not understand what I mean. Expanding on it I mean that its ok to be in a group, to have your friends, to share interests, to belong somewhere. When it becomes an issue is when you are only seen as a person in that group, you are one of the many, the same as the others, no longer your own person.

Soon enough we all grow up. We will all leave behind these groups which we were associated with at one time or another. We begin to live as our own person. You may learn things about yourself which you never knew before because you were shielded behind the identity that your group had.

Whatever you are doing in your life, a job, school, college, just living, don't be afraid to be involved in a group. Just make sure you aren't just another person in that group. Ensure you are still seen as a person in your own respect, don't ever only be defined by the group you belong to. Don't let people see you in the simplest terms and the most convenient definitions, let them see you and how fucking amazing you are.

--- Aimee ---